By Fahima Mahmood
According to the National Coalition against Domestic Violence, one in every four women will experience domestic violence. Sadly, as Muslims we know or have heard of a couple that are in a domestic dispute. Domestic abuse among Muslims is apparent among those who believe Islam allows violence or the beating of women. They take one or two ayats of the Qur’an, often reading part of it, to showcase their point that they are right in beating their wife.
So what does the Qur’an say about beating your wife? In surahAn-Nisa, ayat34, it states “As to those women on whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, caution (and warn) them (against the specific faults, at first), refuse to share their beds (next), beat them (lightly, at the very last); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of angering them).”
This means if you fear your wife committing a sin or is behaving poorly, talk to her about her actions.Proceed to give her a warning if she doesn’t listen. If that doesn’t work, separate from the bed, which means relations shouldn’t take place. If she continues, then you may resort to light force. The light force that is used should not cause bleeding, breakage, swelling or damage to her skin. The light force should also not be applied to any sensitive part of her body.
Of course, giving these implications it’s difficult to carry out any beatings. Following these guidelines will only permit you to tab her on the shoulder or arm and nothing else. To follow through with the use of light force, if you can call it that, might not be effective at all.
If using light force or separating from the bed will not correct the behavior or cause a worse reaction than it shouldn’t be used. Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, throughout his life never used light force on any of his wives. His never raised his hand or voice to any of his wives and his companions followed his example.
It’s also important to note that this ayat of the Quran refers to sins such as adultery. According to sharia law, those who commit adultery are punished by stoning. Rather than letting your wife go commit adultery, it was permissible to follow what the ayat states above. This doesn’t mean to use light force on your wife for not ironing your shirt or having dinner ready.
The Qur’an doesn’t condone violence or beating of women. If you are unhappy with your wife, talk to her first and then stop relations before you proceed to use light force, which is nothing more than tapping her. In fact, it was the saying of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), "Do not beat Allah's bondwomen. Those who do so, that is, those who take to beating their wives, are not the best among you.''
I'd love to hear your views on this article. Please tell me in the comments section below :)
Jul 11, 2011
12:00 PM Habibi Halaqas 2 comments