By Alawiya Abdalla
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Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
On my way to Costa and I am feeling so giddy and happy with excitement
I have a big clue of what is to come Inshallah
This is it. The moment I have been waiting for my whole life
My moment of happiness had been slightly hinged by the sudden appearance of Ibrahim at my house though
He just HAD to ruin it, did he not?
Why did he decide to appear at that moment? And what is up with my mum man
“Come in come in. It’s OK you are my son, and these are your sisters!” Actually she did not say that, but if she did not shut the door in my face I would have heard THAT excuse for sure
He is not our brother, so he is NOT allowed to come in the house whenever he wanted
But I had no time to kick him out and argue my case, I had to leave otherwise I would have missed the 113 bus and then it would have been ages until the next one comes
I am sitting in the 113 bus going to Edgware station acting all holier than thou, when I know that I cannot pick and choose what I can and cannot practice regarding my religion
I have never done this before, and the guilt is tearing me apart
I can feel a massive guilt building up in the pit of my stomach, which is WHY I am feeling slightly nauseous
Meeting a stranger in a Cafe
But I keep telling myself that he will not be a stranger for long, Inshallah
Who am I kidding? This is totally Haram! I keep beautifying what I have been doing for a couple of months with the pretence that it is leading somewhere Halal
This is the time when I wish that my mum’s brother would have been useful, but he went and asked for Luul’s hand for his son and mum refused putting the blame on me being the eldest for her refusal and thus fuelling my uncle’s hatred towards me. He never liked me in the first place
He would always make subtle remarks about my skin colour, and my height
He would always say that I am hindering my sisters’ opportunities, by not finding a suitable husband yet!!!
What am I supposed to do? Go to a wedding and grab the microphone from the DJ, who has been yelling “SHAKE IT” for the past hour or so and scream from the top of my lungs
“WOULD YOU ALL PAY ATTENTION PLEASE? I would like to announce that I’m STILL available by the way, so if you wanna come to my house and propose I’m totally OK WITH THAT”
Is that what he wants me to do??? What an insensitive person
I brush my anger and guilt aside as the bus comes to a stop at Edgware, and I head towards the Cafe.
My face feels so heavy from all the foundation, Mascara and eye-liner that filled my face
And to make matters worse, the weather is warm and stuffy which makes my face all sticky
It is not even June yet It is only April!
I feel like all the make-up I put on my face is melting away!
Great, JUST great
I do not have a plan yet, as in I do not know what am going to do? You know when idiots leave the house thinking, yep today I have a GREAT plan but their brains have other plans in store You know, to make them look stupid and stuff? Yep, that is how I am feeling right now
All I know is that I need to speak to Hamadi, before Jawahir does
I really am making this plan up as I go
All I know is, I have to stop Hamadi from revealing his plan to propose to Jawahir's sister
How? I do not know actually
But SOMETHING will come out of my mouth I am sure, Inshallah
OK now it’s all a matter of finding where they are meeting. That should not be so hard? Right?
Okay the good news is I have spotted Hamadi in Costa, but he has not seen me yet
The bad news is my make up is COMPLETELY melting___Like COMPLETELY so I decided to go in the public restroom and try to salvage my crumbling make up
Right. How do you save a crumbling make up?
If I take a tissue and remove the mascara goop this way and then____NOOOOO I removed some of my eye liner, and now it looks all smudged in with the goop
I arrived at Edgware Mall, and by my calculation Jawahir should have arrived 5 minutes ago. I drove there so I got here in no time you see
Jawahir told me that she will meet Hamadi at Costa, now the question is where IS Costa
I normally go to Brent Cross Shopping Centre, and I know where everything is by heart but Edgware? I know nothing about it. I decide to start my search inside the mall, and then try the outside. All I know is there are 3 Cafes in Edgware and most them are off the busy high street road , so it is either Costa or Starbucks that is on the inside of the mall.
REMIND ME WHY AM I DOING THIS AGAIN ?
I think it was a reflux reaction, that must be it. I felt a duty towards Jawahir. I overheard that she could be possibly heading towards an inevitable embarrassment, and I just had to stop Hamadi. Anyone would have done SOMETHING, right?
My thoughts and mixed feelings came to a halt as I spotted Hamadi waiting nervously for Jawahir. Jawahir is nowhere to be seen though
I see this as my cue to go and speak with Hamadi, before Jawahir decides to show up suddenly.
I march over to him, and stand there looking at him and he looks at me
“Can I help you?” He asks nervously
I do not say anything, and I take a seat in front of him. I take in his polished hair, albeit full of gel. His Casual Pocket Point Slim Shirt and his Topman Jeans indicate that he is a man who is into appearances, and a little bit vain
He was never gonna ask someone as pure as Jawahir to marry him. He wanted a trophy wife, and he painfully reminds me of how I was. I wanted the trophy wife as well. Looks were the most important thing I wanted in a wife, I thought if she was beautiful from the outside she would sure be beautiful from the inside. How wrong was I? Oh how wrong
And that is when it hit me!
I AM going to ask Jawahir to marry me
She would make the perfect wife__
She is funny__
And she has got the purest heart ever
Why did I not think of it before? I know. Cuz she was driving me CRAZY half of the time with her nonsense
“Who are you dude? You’re starting to scare me! If you don’t leave, I'm gonna kick you so hard you’ll__” I cut him off before he had the chance to finish his sentence. “My name is Ibrahim, and I'm here to talk about Jawahir” I put him out of his misery. “How did you know I was meeting Jawahir??” He asked, looking nervous all of a sudden
“Let’s just say, Jawahir told me everything there is to know about your emails to her on Facebook” I reveal it, feeling slightly smug
“I was just trying to be close to her, because I wanted her to like me. You see I want to propose to her sister Luul, and I was just being nice to her because her sister looks up to her!” He stammers the words out, as if he is not telling the whole truth
“Are you honestly trying to tell me that your intentions were purely for the sake of being nice to Luul’s sister, or did you string both sisters along and you found amusement in the situation?” I accuse him directly, so he will not have the chance to make up a lie
I am not proud of it, but I am the master of turning everything onto the person who is actually telling the truth
The most recipient to my mischievousness is poor Ahmed. He always ends up making it up to me somehow
One of these days, I will repay him somehow, Inshallah
“No I didn't! I don’t know what you’re talking about?” He denies my accusations. “So making Jawahir write essays and assignments for you was purely coincidental?” I look around to see if Jawahir is around, I really need to move in for the kill
“What do you want now?” He finally gets that he needs to co operate with me if he ever thinks he has a chance with Jawahir’s sister. “I want you to go along with every single word I say, do you understand?” I lock my eyes with his in determination. “Alright! Does that mean you’re gonna help me with Luul?” He asks hopefully
“NO! I know you wanted to humiliate Jawahir, and you know she would have agreed for you to marry her sister anyway. But you wanted to laugh at her expense didn't you? So you’re on your own mate! Talk to the mum and see what she says” I make sure he KNOWS that we are NOT mates, and never will be!
Where is Jawahir? And why is she taking so long
Okay, so operation fix my make up has failed miserably and I decided to take off my make up instead
Subhanallah, I feel a lot lighter already
I check my watch, and I realize that I am 10 minutes late
I put my make up removal wipes in my bag and make my way quickly to the Cafe. I Spot Hamadi immediately, and in my moment of rush I don’t notice the man sitting opposite him.
“Asalamu Alykum Hamadi, I’m so sorry for the delay. Lots of last minute disruptions occurred, I was actually on time but something made me late” I do not mention the melting make up incident, You do not freak a guy out like that who intends to propose now do you?
And that is when I noticed the fly__I mean IBRAHIM sitting opposite Hamadi
WHAT IS HE DOING HEEEREEEEE?!
“Ibrahim? What__I mean why__What are you doing here??” I could not even make up my mind between all the What and Why questions forming in my head right now! “I wanted to tell Hamadi something, and I told him all about it don’t you worry” He reassures me with a smile
“May I ask what that was?” I look around as I suddenly notice that I am sitting with TWO men
TWO men!! What if an aunty walked past and recognized me
“You know this and that, and how Hamadi needs to go away so I can propose” He says it casually, and I did not immediately clock it but when I did___“WHAT?” I reply loudly to his utter madness, and then I notice people looking at our table and I lower my voice “I mean what?”
“You heard me, I think I should marry you instead of Hamadi. Don’t you agree Hamadi? He looks over at Hamadi as if they were the newest best mates in town
“Yeah. I think you should marry him, he deserves you more. I'm no good” Agrees Hamadi, looking all sad but casting a glance towards Ibrahim at the same time
“Hamadi it’s OK. You can go now mate, I’ll explain everything to Jawahir. So thankful for your gracious defeat ” Ibrahim rises and shakes Hamadi’s hand
“That’s alright mate, We did say, only the best out of us will ask for her hand so I understand” He GRACIOUSLY leaves the Cafe
I say nothing for a good few minutes and then
“WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?” I yell the question, and the people at the cafe look at my table again “I mean what was that about?” I say it quietly__Again
Well can you blame me???
What is going on? One minute I was excited at the prospect that Hamadi was going to propose to me, and now Ibrahim is proposing??????
“You need to calm down. I will bring my mum and my family tomorrow to meet your family, and we shall talk, Inshallah. Yes?” He replies with an annoying calmness, that is making me want to tear my hair out
“Is this some of kind of a joke? Do you think this is funny?” I feel fire coming out of my mouth AND ears
“Walahi I'm not. I've finally realized that we are so suited Jawahir” He answers genuinely “How about it?” He asks me.
“I don’t know what in the world happened to your head? Whatever it is, I'm not happy and I won’t forgive you for ruining it with Hamadi Ibrahim” I say it, getting ready to stand up and storm out of the Cafe.
“Wait! I can be your pancake husband?” He calls out to me as I walk furiously, but then I stop when I hear what he said.
“Pan cake husband??” What is he talking about now
“I’ll bring my mum tomorrow and I’ll explain, Inshallah. You won’t say no to my offer when you hear it” He answers me with a lopsided grin :happy:
What is HE talking about??? As if I will say yes to this madness
I am very mad
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