Jun 2, 2013

Short Story: MY PANCAKE HUSBAND CHAPTER 6

By Alawiya Abdalla

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Bismillah


Jawahir

I am still in a daze and state of shock, not believing that I just delivered a baby
It was surreal and amazing at the same time
If I could bottle what I feel right now, and sell it to people I totally would It is just the most exhilarating feeling ever. I mean the baby was all yucky and covered in an unspeakable goo and blood, but the look of relief on Khadija’s face was priceless
The ambulance arrived 10 minutes after the actual birth, checked on the baby and Khadija, did some other stuff that we could not see and they immediately took them to hospital.
Aunty Halima arrived soon after, and as soon as she saw the ambulance she fired questions at all of us

“WHAT HAPPENED?”
“WHY ARE YOU ALL STARING AT ME?”
“IF NONE OF IS GONNA SAY ANYTHING TO ME, I WILL KICK YOU ALL. AND YES THAT INCLUDES YOU JAWAHIR”

Then she started counting us, and she figured that Mohamed, Khadija and her kids were missing.
“WHAT HAPPENED TO MOHAMED AND KHADIJA AND MY GRANDCHILDREN?”
“SPEAK UP FOOLS, I WARNED YOU ALL IF YOU DON’T SPEAK UP I WILL KICK YOU. AND YES THAT INCLUDES YOU TOO JAWAHIR”

And THAT IS when Ahmed regained his speech
“Khadija had her baby here in the house”
“And she kept squeezing my hand, and now it hurts. Look ma, look” Asha regains her speech
“And I found Mohamed and brought him all the way here. IN THE SNOW Ma, I can’t feel my feet. Look ma, look” IBRAHIM regains his speech, and he also takes off his shoes to show his mum how blue they are
Men are such babies
No IBRAHIM is such a baby
My thoughts were interrupted, by the sudden interest in what I had to say about the subject
All eyes rested on me, as they waited for a good 1 minute seen as the cat OBVIOUSLY got my tongue right at that moment
“I caught the baby as it came out?” I was finally able to say something, when you know. The cat returned my tongue and everything
Silence ensued and then________

“I KNOW SUBHANALLAH MA IT WAS SO EMOTIONAL” Asha said excitedly, before adding “BUT SO YUCKY”

“Yeah I mean how hard can it be?” Ibrahim decides to be all manly about it, EVEN THOUGH I swear to Allah I saw him wiping his eyes not long ago when he held the baby and then blamed it on his allergies
WHAT ALLERGIES
The guy has NO allergies as far as I know
MEN
“Jawahir, YOU delivered the baby?” Aunty Halima asks, with so much love and pride in her eyes
“Not really, Khadija did all the hard work. I just caught it that’s all” I feel shy, at being the centre of attention all of a sudden
“I let Khadija squeeze my hands too you know, just saying”, mumbles Asha, obviously feeling left out
“Mashallah, you make me proud you two. Right now, I need to go to the hospital though. Who will give me a lift?” She asks, grabbing her purse and getting ready to exist the house.
“I will ma” Replies Ibrahim, grabbing his purse (JUST KIDDING) his KEYS and getting ready to exist
“NO!” She turns around abruptly, then she walks towards Ahmed and grabs him from his collar and says
“Ahmed here will give me a lift. Ibrahim YOU give Jawahir a lift home, after all she has been our hero today wasn't she just?” She looks at Ibrahim affectionately, and then she looks at me with the same look

“HELLO?”, yells Asha, gesturing towards her bruised hands
“Put some ice on it! Ibrahim, make sure you drive safely OK. Look after Jawahir” She looks at me affectionately, and this time she takes my hands in hers and___
She just looks at me___
For a good 2 minutes
What is going on??
Are Khadija and aunty Halima trying to fix me up with Ibrahim FOR REAL

Oh no! No no no__
No no no no

“Fine, I’ll accompany them then!”, announces Asha to my delight
“NO!! You stay, they go”, objects aunty Halima angrily
“Ma! Asha’s right. She needs to accompany them, you cannot expect Jawahir to be in a car with Ibrahim alone do you?”, adds Ahmed rationally
“Of course! How could I forget something like that!” She slaps her head, in an exaggerated gesture
“Do I get a say in any of this? I might not want to give her a lift you know!” Ibrahim decides to do what he does best__
Annoying the living daylights out of me

And that is what I needed to make me respond with
“Oh but you must. I am a lady after all, and only a man with no morals would let an honourable lady leave the house alone” I produce what they call word vomit, but in my defence Ibrahim does have a talent in bringing the worst out of me
Ibrahim growls and mumbles venomous stuff that I cannot seem to make out
“Would you speak up, I cannot seem to hear what you’re saying there” I relish this moment just a tad

“Fascinating”, Aunty Halima whispers it to herself, looking at Ibrahim and then me “How have I never noticed it before?”
“Mum, we need to go now. It’s gonna be a long and slow drive” Ahmed tells aunty Halima, and he takes her by the hand so she will not have a say anymore (gently of course)
They disappear a few minutes later, and I wait patiently and annoyingly happy for Ibrahim to give us a lift
“The internet is a FASCINATING world, don’t you think so Jawahir?” Asks Ibrahim, relishing my obvious discomfort

Asha disappeared to get her coat
“Obviously I do. I mean you can find all sorts of discoveries in it” I try to reply with a cool retort, but it ends up sounding so lame
“I'M READY” Asha bounces back into the living room, and totally saving me from an imminent embarrassment

“Let’s go” He says it, as he growls and frowns and does all sorts of angry faces
We step outside, and notice the blizzard stopped. Everywhere looks so white and beautiful and amazing and__
Oh who cares, it is FREEZINGGGGG
Marvellous, JUST marvellous 


Ibrahim

I hate snow
I bet everyone is updating their Facebook status right now, I can just imagine it
“It’s so beautiful outside” or
“Having a snow fight with my BFF”
Or worse
Sharing a view of the snow from their window, with a message that says
“Look how beautiful it is outside” (The author is guilty of all these crimes Ibrahim, just saying)

It is NOT cute.
It is NOT pretty.
It is NOT amazing.
It is SNOW. Cold, slippery and cruel
I can hear you all yelling “GRUMPY OLD MAN” but I can explain.
I always fall and slip and look so ridiculous, and I end up feeling wet and humiliated

“Let’s walk it, it’s faster plus Jawahir’s flat is not far from here” Suggests Asha happily
“Let’s not” I reply firmly
“Afraid we might fall are we?”, asks Jawahir sarcastically, treading carefully across the ice making her look like a rabbit caught in headlights
“You are one to talk! Look how you’re walking!” I tread carefully too, which ends up making me look like a terrified little girl
I JUST walked across this ice with Mohamed! Arrrghh

“I'm perfectly alright. All you need to do is walk from this an__” She does not finish her sentence, as KABUM she falls BADLY.

I should not laugh, a gentleman would not laugh
Oh who cares. I am so going to laugh at her
“Don’t be mean Ibrahim!” Asha scolds me, when she comes to Jawahir's rescue
And I continue laughing
“I was TRYING to help HIM. Never again I promise” Mumbles Jawahir, as Asha pulls her up. She stumbles a little but regains her balance quickly with Asha's support.

“Who told you to help me? I'm totally under control here. I'm walking like how pro wal__” I inform her arrogantly, before___

Yep, I fall on my backside too

And now it is Jawahir’s turn to mock me
“Yeah yeah funny!” I try to pull myself up, but I totally keep slipping as temperatures drop really low making the road completely icy. “What’s wrong with you two? You’re like school kids, snipping at each other every second” Asha decides to do the right thing, and tell us off.

“It’s his fault”
“Her fault”
“His”
“Hers”
“No it’s My fault”
“No mine. Oh wait!”

She laughs hysterically at my mishap

“I GIVE UP!” Asha throws her hands up in the air as she says it “Listen you two, this needs to stop right now because mum and Khadija think this is just like the movies when the man and the woman snipe at each when they ACTUALLY really like each other?” She tries to make us see the bigger picture

“Oh no, euughhh” replies Jawahir in disgust
“Me and HER?? Oh please! I would rather eat paper for breakfast, lunch and dinner” I emphasize my disgust too
“OK talk it out, because you are giving them hope. Try to find a way to communicate with each other, without making it looks like you secretly like each other. Next thing you know, mum would be dropping at Jawahir’s house UNINVITED” Asha reminds us of the grim situation.

“We should totally come to a mutual understanding” replies Jawahir, rather too urgently
“We totally should” I agree with what she says, rather too urgently too
“Right. Now let’s walk carefully before any of you fa___” Yep you guessed it, Asha fell

But hold on! SHE did not fall. Someone else fell as she bumped into him
“I'm so sorry” Asha apologizes to the man who fell. He does not answer her, but looks at her in anger
“Watch where you’re going next time” He warns her, before lifting himself off the floor in one slick move
We all watch him as he makes his way to the house next to ours
Mrs Evans moved and we did not know about it??

He looks at Asha one more time before he enters his house (The author would like to remind everyone to keep this character in mind, as he is the hero of the next story)

“What was THAT about? Rude man!” Mumbles Asha to herself, before she turns her back on his house
“Handsome too”, adds Jawahir, before she realizes that she said it out loud
“Oh please! He is so ugly!” claims Asha, rather too urgently
“He is FINE. Let’s keep going. Remind me again who was the clever clog that suggested we walk?” I look at Jawahir accusingly, feeling all angry all of a sudden
“It was Asha” She answers me confidently
I ignore her, but feel this sudden rush of anger because of her comment

“He’s handsome too” I repeat it in my head, imitating her voice___
In my head
I do not know why I feel this angry. This jealousy
I  AM NOT JEALOUS!
Oh no, I am not!!
I am not jealous
Not at all


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1 comments:

Now, what do you mean by next story, the one after this chapter or after the end of jawahir and ibrahim's story? And you have done midnight chapter, where is my khadijah, and this! So who is d guy? Really intriguing!

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